CHAPTER 23 AFTER THE TERROR

Life after the terrorist attacks was hard on me. My way of life was completely changed and I now looked at the possiblity of loosing the job I loved so much. But at the same time, I was given an opportunity to see more of the world so I took that opportunity. The final chapter discusses how my life changed, how depressed I had become, but ends with a postive twist about the future might hold for me. It was a tough chapter to write and this is only a small look at it.

When I got back to San Francisco I was entering a block of days off. I had missed an entire block of days on while stranded in Annapolis. I now had three days off. Time to reflect, time to be with my pets, to discuss the previous week with friends, and time to start worrying about my future. But I was not finished grieving. In fact, it felt good to grieve and each time something made me cry, I felt better afterwards. It became almost like I had to grieve because of the weight of the tragedy. It was my duty, my contribution.

There was a private service held at the airport. It was open to airline employees only. I put on my cleanest uniform, pinned on new black ribbons with the downed flight numbers printed in gold ink, and went to be with my professional family. It was very solemn. Guards monitored the entrance checking IDs of those who passed. There were many flight attendants, several supervisors, a hand full of pilots, some ground staff and customer service reps.

The service was held in the old international terminal. It had been vacant since the international operations moved to the new terminal a few months prior. There was a small stage set up in the corner. On the stage, behind the lectern, were flowers and candles. A US flag stood proud, and banners from each of the airlines who lost planes hung from the ceiling. Just below these were large model airplanes from each carrier. The windows looked out onto the tarmac. Just before the service started, a plane taxied by the windows heading to the runway for take off. The first officer’s cockpit window was open and the American flag was sticking out of it, rustling in the breeze. It caught everyone’s attention and brought applause from everyone in the room. Not a rousing applause, but a dignified applause, like one would hear in a church or on a golf course.

I looked around the room and noticed the people looking out the window clapping. Most were teary-eyed. As the plane rounded the corner and out of sight, they turned and resumed their conversation. I found some classmates of mine and found hugs when I went over to them. We started talking about where we were when the attacks happened, what we were going to do after loosing our job, and how fortunate we had been in not knowing anyone lost. Several said that they didn’t think they would return to flying. I was bound and determined that I would eventually return, no matter how long it took.

The service was respectful and, solemn but long. Clergy from many faiths spoke. Pilots read poems. The names of the employees who died were read. We had lost twenty-five flight attendants, eight pilots and a few other employees who had been passengers that day. We recited the pledge of allegiance and sung a few patriotic songs. Everyone was able to cry and embrace their flying partners and friends. It was truly a close-knit family grieving opportunity. I had spoken to people who said they just could not go to it. They were already too emotional. But I found a need to be surrounded by others who were going through the same pain that I was. I needed to see that I was not alone in my anger, in my sorrow, and in the uncertainty that I was feeling for what would happen next with my job.

The Union was busy getting out information to us. They listed resources for preparing for being furloughed. The contract deals specifically for this possibility. If furloughed, I have the right to my old job once it becomes available. Employees are let go by reverse seniority order: the newest to be hired go first. When the recalls come, we are brought back by seniority order: the newest comes back last. We were guaranteed our old jobs for a period of eight years. If the furloughs lasted longer than that, I would have to re-apply for my job when it became available. There had been other furloughs in recent memory, and no one I ever spoke to felt that the furlough would last very long. But was unsure. Aviation had never seen a setback like this one.

Our union held several meetings in the following weeks to answer everyone’s questions. Before the numbers of the furlough were announced, there was much speculation over how many would be affected. The company was offering voluntary furloughs, an effort to help save the jobs for those who really needed them. If one took the voluntary furlough, there were certain benefits to doing so, seniority would continue, whereas it would freeze for the involuntary. One could still have medical benefits as opposed to having them for only ninety days. One could still have pass travel benefits as well.

When the numbers were finally announced, it would affect 5,374 flight attendants, just over one thousand would be from SFO. It would affect people hired any time after February of 1997. Although I knew I would not be able to escape the furlough with a seniority of August 2000, the news sank in heavily. My family was very concerned when I made the calls to inform them. Many asked what I was going to do next. Many had the opinion that this was terminal, that I would need to find a new career. I always answered with, “It’s just a matter of time before I get called back. I’ll just find a little temporary job until then.” I even started to wonder if I was not taking the furlough as seriously as I should have, with the severity that my family was taking it.

I didn’t want to see the finality in it that others saw. In fact I wanted to make the best of this that I could. The company was going to allow us ninety days of pass travel benefits. That meant free travel through the end of January. I still had a lot of money saved from my Harley days. I decided to put off finding another job and started making plans to see the world. Why waste an opportunity to do so for free? Should I never get this job back, I would regret it. The plan was to travel for a month, and then I would look for work. But I still had a few weeks to work before being let go.